Lesson video

Hello and welcome to our final lesson in this unit, Mental Wellbeing, talking about our emotions.

Now in this lesson, we will learn about the emotions associated with grief.

We will also discuss some possible coping strategies and how we can support each other.

Now, this lesson does contain sensitive content.

So please make sure that if you are feeling uncomfortable you have either had an appropriate adult to check through the lesson prior to you going through it or that you have a trusted adult nearby.

For this lesson, you will need either an exercise book or some paper and a pen to write with.

If you don't have that equipment in front of you now just pause the video collect what you need and press play, when you are ready to carry on.

Let's now have a look at the agenda for today's lesson.

We will start by discussing the emotions that can be associated with grief.

We will discuss some possible coping strategies and how we can support others.

We will then end with a reflection and exit quiz.

Our keyword for today's lesson is grief.

Now, most people will experience grief when they lose someone or something important to them.

Let's start by discussing the emotions that can be associated with grief.

I would like to begin this lesson by getting you to think back to last lesson.

And can you remember any of the emotions that we discussed? They were six in total.

Pause the video now and write down on your piece of paper, as many as those emotions that you can remember.

Press play when you're ready to find out if you got them right.

So let's see.

On your piece of paper, have you written down the following, happiness, sadness, fear, disgust, anger and surprise.

These were the six emotions we discussed last lesson.

And you might find that some of these are similar to when we talk about emotions and grief and some of these are very different.

Bereavement grief and loss can cause many different symptoms and they affect people in completely different ways.

There is no right or wrong way to deal with grief.

As well as bereavement, there are other types of loss.

Such as the end of a relationship or the loss of a job or home.

Here are some commonly associated emotions with grief.

Shock and numbness.

This is usually what is reported as the first reaction to loss.

And often people talk about being in a daze.

Overwhelming sadness and uncontrollable crying.

Tiredness or exhaustion.

And sometimes anger towards the person that you have lost or the reason for your loss.

And finally, guilt.

Guilt about feeling angry about something you said or did about something you didn't say and not being able to stop your loved one from dying.

These feelings may not be there all the time and powerful feelings can overcome us unexpectedly.

It is not always easy to recognise grief or loss as the reason that you are acting or feeling differently.

And the timescales can be different for every single person.

Let's now discuss some coping strategies because there are lots of different ways to support you and others out there.

How you grieve depends on many different factors, including your personality, your coping style, your life experience, your faith and the nature of your loss.

There is no normal timetable.

And you should allow the process to naturally unfold.

Please be patient with yourself.

Time for an activity now.

Here on the screen, are some different ways that people might consider when dealing with grief.

I would like you to pause the video and to organise these onto your piece of paper as to things that you think are good ways to deal with grief and things that you think are not good ways to deal with grief.

For example, talking about your feelings.

Do we think that is a good way to deal with grief or not so positive way? I am sure that you all agree with me that that is a good way to deal with grief.

And talking to others and sharing your feelings is a very important part of the process.

Pause the video now and complete the activity on the piece of paper in front of you.

Press play when you are ready to resume.

So, let's compare our answers.

Now I have decided that all of these are good ways to deal with grief.

So as before we discussed talking about your feelings.

Getting help if you are struggling to sleep.

Setting yourself small manageable targets.

Considering peer support, talking to your friends, reaching out both to your family and your school, and even taking time to listen to relaxation or meditation apps.

My list for things that are not a positive way to deal with grief included, feeling alone.

You are not alone.

Lots of people have dealt with grief, are dealing with grief, I would know of the people you should always feel there is someone that you can talk to.

Trying to do everything at once.

Again, this is not possible.

So please take time and go back to settings small targets.

And finally, focusing on things that you cannot change.

It's really important to remember, that all you can do is to control the things that are controllable, not everything is.

And do make sure that you are sharing your emotions and sharing the workload around you.

Well done.

Pause the video now, if you want to make any amendments to your table and when you're ready let's move on.

A true or false question for you here.

Now this is our keyword from earlier in this unit of work.

Emotions are strong feelings which come from our circumstances, our mood or relationships with others.

Is that a good, true definition or is that false? Point to the screen now.

I am sure that you have remembered that well.

That is a true definition for the word emotion.

Can you now remember those emotions that we discussed were associated with grief? Pause the video and see how many you can jot down on your piece of paper.

Press play, when you're ready to see the list again.

Now remember, these are commonly associated emotions.

So you might experience completely different ones and that's okay.

They were shock and numbness, overwhelming sadness, tiredness, anger, and guilt.

Pause the video, if you want to make any changes to the list that you have made.

Another true or false statement for you here.

Not everybody will experience grief when they lose something or someone.

Point to the screen now, with whether you considered this to be true or false.

I'm sure that you agree with me and remember the keyword from today's lesson that actually most people will experience grief when they lose something or someone important to them.

Now, once again, reflect back on the previous lesson you might remember that we discussed this as a coping strategy.

Can you remember what order these different steps went in? Pause the video now, and rearrange these statements onto your piece of paper.

Press play when you are ready to resume.

So the first step we discussed last lesson was to name the feeling that you are experiencing.

We then discussed, accepting the feeling.

Saying it out loud, always helps.

Next, finding a way to express the feeling and finally picking a healthy way to take care of yourself.

If you need to make any amendments, to what you wrote down on your piece of paper, pause the video now, and do so.

So, let's have a think about how we could use that system and those steps, when we are talking about grief.

If for example, we name the feeling as anger.

We discussed at the beginning that it's okay to feel angry.

You might feel angry with the person that has died or with yourself, but what's important is that you accept what you are feeling.

You might say this statement, I am angry.

I am angry that someone has left me.

Express the feeling.

You might do this by writing it down and reading it back to yourself.

And when finding a healthy way to deal with the feeling of anger you might think about asking for support, share with them your thoughts and feelings and ask for help.

So is this statement true or false? We should discuss how we are feeling with others.

I'm sure you agree with me that over these lessons that I have said this is a very important thing to do.

And so therefore this statement is true.

Talk to people around you, whether that be your family your friends, or your school, there are lots of people in your life that will want to listen to you and we'll want to help you.

The next part of our lesson, is to discuss how we can help others.

I would like you to take some thinking time now, and consider this question.

Why should we talk about grief? Pause the video for a minute or so, and think about, why this might be an important thing to do.

So, what did you come up with? Nobody should feel alone.

And everybody should know that grief is hard.

Grief is associated with many different emotions.

And it is important that you know that by talking about them, you support others and yourself.

It is far better to say something than to avoid talking about or discussing the issue all together.

That is why it is important to talk about grief.

Our next task, is to think about ways that we can help others.

I would like you to create a spider diagram on your piece of paper.

I'm going to start you off.

This is my first idea on how I think we could help others through the process of grief.

Offering to spend lunch or break time with someone might give them that support that they need.

They may wish to talk about the grief that they are experiencing or they may wish to talk about other things.

And that is okay.

Pause the video now and complete the spider diagram with some more ideas on how you could help others through the process of grief.

Press play, when you are ready to share some ideas.

I would like to share with you now, some more ideas on how we could help others during the process of grief.

Make sure that you talk and listen to the other person.

Don't try to tell them how they should be grieving.

Remember we have discussed today that there is no normal timetable and everybody will experience grief differently.

And finally, offer practical help.

That might be sending them the homework that was set that day or even doing shopping for them.

Helping others through the process of grief is not easy, but it is wonderful if you can try and help, even in the smallest of ways.

Part two of this task, is to think about how you can actually help yourself if you are going through grief.

Once again, let's make a spider diagram together.

My first idea for helping yourself during grief is to see a counsellor.

These are available in person and online and it will give you the opportunity to speak to someone who was a little bit removed from the situation and express how you are feeling.

Pause the video now, and see if you can add anything else to the spider diagram.

How else can you help yourself, if you go through the process of grief? Press play, when you are ready to once again, share ideas.

Let's now share some additional ideas.

So another way to deal with the process of grief might be to do something to celebrate the life of the person that you have lost.

It is important as well that you find perhaps a creative outlet to help you to deal with the process of grief.

This might be some art projects like painting or drawing.

And finally, there are lots of useful podcasts and apps out there that might help you with the process.

Do have a look at the technology that is available to you.

Let's end today's lesson with a reflection.

You also have an exit quiz to complete and this summarises the whole unit of work that we have completed together.

When reflecting on today's lesson, remember, that most people experience grief when they lose something or someone important to them.

Grieving is highly personal and then an individual experience for us all.

And whatever your grief experience, it is important to be patient with yourself.

Don't forget that.

I would really encourage you, that if you have been affected by anything in this lesson, to reach out to other people to help.

There are lots of useful websites out there and people in your family and at your school might be able to advise you further.

If you would like to share any of your work from today's lesson, remember to do so using the #LearnwithOak.

Thank you so much for joining me once again.

And I look forward to working with you again in the future.

Bye Bye.