Hello, everyone.

It's lovely to see you here today.

My name's Dr.

Clayton, and I'm going to guide you through your learning journey today.

So today lesson's called Writing an Extended Written Response on the Eduqas 2025 Poetry Anthology.

So we're gonna be thinking about how we can write effective comparative introductions, how we can develop ideas within our paragraphs, then you are going to write your written response.

So if you're ready, grab your pen or laptop and let's get started.

So by the end of the lesson, you'll be able to create a written response which meets success criteria.

So we have four words today we're going to be using as our keywords.

They'll be identified in bold throughout the learning material and I'll try to point out to you as well so you can see them being used in context.

So our first keyword is overarching, which means the most important, because of including or affecting all other areas.

So when we talk about the overarching introduction, we mean introducing the argument that ties all of the other areas together.

Our second keyword is nuanced, which means it has subtle details that make it complex and interesting.

So when we're making comparison, we want to identify nuanced, so small differences, within an overall similarity to create a complex argument.

Our third keyword is futility, which means the fact of having no effect or of achieving nothing.

We're gonna be thinking about how Owen's 'Disabled' might reflect the futility of war.

And our final keyword is intention, which means something you want and plan to do, an aim.

So when we talk about the writer's intentions, we mean what do they want to achieve through their writing.

So I'll just give you a moment to write down those keywords and the definitions.

So pause the video, write them down now.

Fantastic, let's get started with the lesson.

So we have three learning cycles in our lesson today.

For our first learning cycle, we're going to be talking through how we might approach writing a comparative introduction.

For our second learning cycle, we're gonna be thinking about how we might develop our ideas within our paragraphs.

For the final learning cycle, you are going to write your comparative essay.

Now when you're writing a comparative response, you want to include a comparative introduction that will introduce the reader to your argument and it'll be the thread that ties your whole argument together.

So a comparative introduction should explain your overarching argument about the poems in response to the question.

So your overall argument that ties your response together and reveal what you think the similarities and differences are between the poems in response to the question.

So an effective introduction might move from the general to the specific.

So you might start with a sentence about both poems, exploring the overarching similarity between them.

Then you might narrow down the similarities in both poems in relation to big ideas.

Then you might explain your specific thesis.

So what are the nuanced differences within that similarity? Now, nuanced is one of our keywords.

It means how subtle details make it complex and interesting.

So what are the subtle differences within the overall similarity that can make a complex argument? So now for a quick check for understanding.

So which part of the suggested comparative introduction model is missing? Pause the video, take a few moments to think about it.

Welcome back everyone.

The correct answer is narrow down the similarities in both poems in relation to big ideas.

So very well done if you got that right.

Amazing work everyone, we're now on the first task of the lesson.

Now our question is, compare the way poets present ideas about war in 'Disabled' and one other poem from the Eduqas 2025 anthology.

So what I'd like you to do is write a comparative introduction to answer the question.

Now remember to begin with a sentence about both poems, exploring the overarching similarity between them.

Then narrow down on the similarities in both poems in relation to big ideas.

Then include your specific thesis that shows the nuanced differences within that similarity.

So pause the video, write your introduction now.

Welcome back everyone, some great work there.

Now what I'd like you to do is think about Jacob's ideas and whether or not you agree.

So Jacob said, both Owen and Garland address the aftermath of war and how soldiers can struggle to integrate back into their former lives.

More specifically, both poems suggest that soldiers experience a sense of isolation from others as well as the loss of their identity as a result of war.

However, we might interpret Owen's 'Disabled' as suggesting the soldier's physical injuries leave him feeling incomplete and isolated.

In comparison, we might see Garland's 'Kamikaze' as depicting how ideological changes leave the father ostracised from his family and society.

So pause the video, think about whether or not you agree with Jacob.

Welcome back everyone.

So we can see here Jacob starts with the overall similarity that both poems address how former soldiers struggle in the aftermath of war.

He's then narrowed that down to explain how both poems show that former soldiers experience a loss of identity and a sense of isolation.

Then he's ended by showing the nuanced differences within that similarity.

So Owen's 'Disabled' shows that isolation and loss of identity come from the impact of physical injuries.

While Garland shows the isolation and loss of identity come from ideological changes.

Amazing work everyone.

We're now at the second learning cycle.

We're going to talk through how you might develop your ideas within your paragraphs.

So in order to prove our argument to the reader, we need to fully develop our ideas in our analytical writing.

Always remember you are aiming to convince the reader that your interpretation's valid.

So we might develop ideas through the following.

We might explain the effect on the reader.

We might extend our analysis by adding a further quotation.

We might analyse the language more closely.

We might give alternative interpretation.

So when writing analytically, we might use discourse markers to explore multiple angles of an idea.

So to add further ideas or to sequence our ideas, we might use the words furthermore, additionally, and moreover.

If we're giving examples we might use, for example, illustrated by or for instance.

If we're showing cause and effect, we might use therefore, thus, or consequently.

And if we're comparing/contrasting ideas, we might use similarly, likewise, or whereas.

So for example, Owen compares a soldier to a disease in 'Disabled', which creates the idea the soldier feels isolated and separated from society.

Furthermore, the final words of the poem are, "Why don't they come?", which enhances these ideas of isolation and loneliness.

So here we've used the discourse marker furthermore, to show we're adding an additional idea that extends our original idea.

So let's think about how we might analyse language in more detail.

So when analysing language, we want to think about why the poet has use certain words or language techniques, what the quotations of those words are, and what effect the language has on the reader.

So for example, Owen's description of the soldier's suit as ghastly has connotations of something frightful and ghostly, which suggests the soldier feels not only isolated from others, but that they're fading from existence.

So here, we've said the word ghastly has connotations of something frightful and ghostly.

We've then explained the effect of that, is that the soldier feels isolated 'cause they feel as though others think of them as something frightful.

We've also said they feel as if they're a ghost fading from existence.

Now another way to develop your analysis is to offer alternative interpretation.

This not only helps to show there's no definitive way of interpreting a text, but it also enhances the credibility of your overall argument because it shows how you can reach the same conclusion about the text through multiple avenues of analysis.

So for example, we might consider Owen's description of the soldier's suit as grey to demonstrate how the soldiers lost their joy.

Alternatively, we might see the use of grey as depicting the soldier as almost lifeless.

So here, we've talked about how grey might mean a lack of colour, and we associate colour with happiness and joy, but also it represents the lifelessness of the soldier.

Both interpretations link to the same idea of all the soldiers struggling in the aftermath of war.

So now for a quick check for understanding.

So which of the following is an effective way of developing your ideas in your paragraphs? Is A, you should repeat the same idea multiple times.

B, you might offer alternative interpretation, or C, you should add in longer quotations.

So pause the video, take a few moments to think about it.

Welcome back everyone.

Now repeating the same idea doesn't develop your ideas or make your argument more convincing.

Using longer quotations also doesn't develop your ideas as often the reader doesn't know which part of the quotation you're referring to when you're analysing it, so it can become confusing.

So the correct answer is, you might offer alternative interpretation.

But also you can reach the same interpretation through multiple ways.

Amazing work everyone, we're on the second task of the lesson.

So here's a segment from Sofia's analytical paragraph.

What I'd like you to do is use the additional notes and questions to develop the ideas in Sofia's paragraph.

So Sofia said, by suggesting that the soldier poured himself down shell holes 'til the veins run dry, Owen's referencing the futility of war.

So the additional notes and questions are, what are the connotations of poured? How might those connotations create ideas of futility for the reader? Now, futility is one of our keywords.

It means achieving nothing or having no effect.

So it's the idea that war hasn't achieved anything.

How might the questions at the poem link to these ideas? So pause the video, develop Sofia's answer now.

Welcome back everyone, some great work there.

Now what I'd like you to do is read Andeep's ideas.

Do you agree, why or why not? So Andeep said, by suggesting the soldier poured himself down shell holes 'til the veins run dry, Owen's creating the image of the soldier giving himself completely to the shell holes.

The word poured is a flippant way to refer to the soldier's sacrifice, which arguably suggests how the soldier's life has been used carelessly.

His sacrifice served no discernible purpose, which could reflect the futility of war.

Furthermore, Owen ends the poem in a question.

"Why don't they come?" Which may reflect how ultimately we're left questioning the purpose of war and whether the young men's sacrifices are worth it.

So pause the video and write whether or not you agree with Andeep.

Welcome back everyone.

So here we can see how Andeep has explored the connotations of poured, how it's a flippant way to describe the soldier's injury and blood loss.

Andeep suggested these ideas are carelessness linked to futility 'cause just a soldier's life's been thrown away for no reason.

Then he's added in how the questioning at the end of the poem also leads to question the purpose of war.

Amazing work everyone, we're now on the third learning cycle where you are going to write your comparative answer.

So when writing a comparative response, remember to create an introduction.

Introduce the reader to your argument by showing the similarities, but also the nuanced differences within those similarities.

Develop ideas in an analytical paragraph in order to convince the reader of your argument.

We said how you might develop your ideas by explaining the connotations of individual words and the effect on the reader, adding in a further idea that extends your argument or adding in alternative interpretation.

So now for a quick check for understanding.

What I'd like you to do is tell me whether the following statement is true or false.

Is it true or false? You should only reference similarities between the poems in your comparative introduction.

Pause the video, take a few moments to think about it.

Now the correct answer is false.

Now let's tell me why it's false.

So pause the video, take a few moments to think about it.

Welcome back everyone.

You might have said you should demonstrate the similarities, but also the nuanced differences within those similarities.

So very well done if you got those right.

Fantastic work everyone, we're now at the final task of the lesson.

So what I'd like you to do is write a response to answer the question, compare the way poets present ideas about war in 'Disabled' and one other poem from the Eduqas 2025 anthology.

Now, remember to include a thesis statement which presents the overarching argument.

Topic sentences that explain the individual focus of your paragraphs.

Analysis of methods as your supporting detail.

They'll come from both poems. Concluding sentences that summarise the paragraph and link back to the poets' intentions.

A conclusion that focuses on the poets' overall intentions and what the impact of the text might be today.

Now, intention is one of our keywords, it means the aim or purpose.

So what do the poets hope to achieve through their writing? So pause the video, write your response now.

Welcome back everyone, some amazing work there.

Now what I'd like you to do is self-assess your response.

So did you include the following? A thesis statement which presents the overarching argument.

Topic sentences that explain the individual focus of your paragraphs.

Analysis of methods as your supporting detail.

Concluding sentences that summarise a paragraph and link back to the poets' intentions.

A conclusion that focused on the poets' overall intentions and what the impact of the text might be to today.

So pause the video, self-assess your work now.

Welcome back everyone.

Now hopefully you can take these ideas about writing comparative introductions and developing ideas within your paragraphs and use them in any comparative answer you write going forwards.

You all did amazingly well today, everyone.

Here's a summary of what we covered.

A comparative introduction might offer small variations within a wider similarity between poems. A comparative introduction might offer nuanced differences between poems. You could try to develop your ideas by using discourse markers and alternative interpretations.

The purpose for analytical writing is to convince the reader of your argument.

I really hope you enjoyed the lesson, everyone.

I hope to see you for another lesson soon.

Goodbye.