Lesson video

Hello, my name's Miss Willow, and I'm going to be your teacher for today's lesson.

Today's lesson is called Understanding Peer Pressure, and it fits into the unit Power in Relationships: How Do I Get Help if I Don't Feel Safe? During this lesson, we're going to be talking a little bit about peer pressure, so we recommend that you have an adult with you for the duration of this lesson.

If at any point you do feel worried or uncomfortable, it's really important that you close the screen and that you go and speak to a trusted adult.

Okay, let's make a start.

By the end of today's lesson, you'll be able to explain why peer pressure is so powerful and describe ways that we can say no to our friends.

Before we get started with today's lesson, we need to go over some ground rules.

These help to make sure that everyone feels safe and comfortable throughout today's lesson.

First of all, we have Laura.

Laura says that we need to listen to others.

This means that we are not going to interrupt other people if they're speaking.

Next, we have Andeep.

Andeep reminds us that we need to respect each other's privacy.

This means that we're not going to ask anyone any personal questions, as this can make some people feel uncomfortable.

Next, Jacob says that we need to not have any judgement.

This means that if someone chooses to share a story, experience, or a feeling, we're not going to judge them for it.

And finally, Izzy says that we can choose our level of participation.

This means it's up to us how much we want to join in.

We're now going to go through the keywords for today's lesson.

These are gonna come up quite a few times in today's lesson, so it's important that we know what each of these words mean.

First of all, we have the word motivation.

This is the reason why someone does something.

Next, we have the word popular.

This is how liked or admired someone is.

And finally, we have peer pressure.

This is when someone tries to persuade or force someone else to do something.

As we go through today's lesson, keep an eye out for these keywords, and when you spot them, see if you can remember what they mean.

Today's lesson is split into two learning cycles.

Our first learning cycle is called Why is Peer Pressure So Powerful? And our second learning cycle is called How Can We Say No To Our Friends? We're now going to make a start on our first learning cycle, Why is Peer Pressure So Powerful? We all make choices every day and we make them for different reasons.

These reasons are called our motivations.

They're what drive us to choose one thing over another.

We all have different motivations.

For example, people could be motivated by money and power.

This means that they make their choices based on what will help them to earn more money or will gain more influence over others.

For example, someone who's motivated by money might choose to do a job that pays really well, even if they don't enjoy it very much.

However, someone motivated by power might choose to become a team captain in PE because they want to be in charge and tell others what to do during games.

People can also be motivated by wanting to learn new things.

When someone is motivated by learning, they make choices based on what will help them gain new knowledge or develop new skills.

For example, someone who's motivated by learning might choose to join the chess club because they want to get better at the game, or they might ask lots of questions in science lessons because they're curious about how things work.

They might also choose to read books about topics that interest them in their free time, even when it's not for homework.

Another common motivation is people wanting to be popular.

When someone is motivated by popularity and wanting to be popular, they make choices based on what they think will help them to make new friends or impress the people that they already know.

Many of us would like to be popular among our friends, and this is okay.

Being popular among our friends might mean being well liked, being thought of as fun or cool, our friends wanting to spend more time with us.

For example, someone who's motivated by popularity might choose to join the drama club because they know their friends are interested in it and they want to spend more time together.

They might also choose to be someone who's kind and helpful because they know this makes people want to be around them, or they might learn jokes because they enjoy making their friends laugh.

Let's do a check for understanding to see how you're doing so far.

Which words are missing? "Everyone has blank motivations, for example, money and power, wanting to learn, or being blank with others." Which words are missing? Pause the video, talk to the people around you, or have a think to yourself.

Well done if you said that different and popular were our missing words.

Our full sentence should now say, "Everyone has different motivations, for example, money and power, wanting to learn or being popular with others." Well done if you got this right.

However, sometimes, our desire to be popular can lead us to make choices that we're not always comfortable with.

Peer pressure can be powerful because we often want to please our friends.

We might feel that we should do what they want us to do or do the same things that they do, even if we don't want to do them.

We may feel that we should do these things, even if they make us uncomfortable or if we know that they're not okay.

It can be difficult to be the only one who says no in a group or to make choices that it feels like other people just don't want us to make.

Lucas wants to share his story.

He says, "When I experienced peer pressure, my heart beat really fast and I felt uncomfortable.

I felt that if I didn't do what my friends said, they would think less of me, and the idea of that made me feel really worried and upset.

I didn't want to do what they said, but I wanted to be popular too." Some people believe that being popular is more important than being safe, but Ms. Walsh reminds us that, "This isn't true.

Whilst it can feel good to be popular, our safety and feeling comfortable is more important than that.

Good friends will never pressure us to do something unsafe or something that makes us feel uncomfortable." Peer pressure is powerful because it can change how we see things.

For example, people who peer pressure us can make things sound more safe than they are or less of a big deal.

They can say things like, "Come on, it'll be fine.

You're overthinking it.

Everyone does it.

Or you're being so silly." All of these things make something sound that it's less of a big deal than it really is.

When this happens, we might make decisions that we wouldn't normally.

This can mean that we end up in uncomfortable or unsafe situations.

Here, someone wants to tell us their experience of peer pressure.

They say that, "My friends peer pressured me to ride my bike without my helmet and do a big jump.

They said that they'd all done it before and that it was fine.

I felt really uncomfortable, but I didn't want them to think that I was a baby, so I did it and I ended up hurting myself really badly." Let's do another check for understanding to see how you're doing.

I'd like you to decide is Sofia correct? Sophia says, "Our friends will never peer pressure us to do something dangerous.

It's important to do what they say so that they still like us." What do you think? Is Sofia correct? Pause the video, talk to the people around you or have a think to yourself.

Well done if you said that Sofia is not correct, but why? You might have said, "Our friends can change how we see things, for example, by telling us that it'll be fine if we do something dangerous, but it's more important to be safe than to be popular," and this is really important to remember.

Well done if you got this right.

We're now moving on to our first practise task, and you're doing a brilliant job so far.

Well done.

For this practise task, I'd like you to explain to Alex two reasons why peer pressure is so powerful.

Alex says, "I don't understand why people give into peer pressure.

It's so easy, just say no." Can you explain two reasons why peer pressure is so powerful? Pause the video and we'll go through some potential answers in a few minutes.

Okay, let's see what you might have said.

You might have said that peer pressure is powerful because we often want to please our friends.

We might feel that should do what they want us to do or do the same things that they do.

It's difficult to say no in a group or make choices that other people don't want us to make, especially if we're the only one making that choice.

Some people believe that being more popular is more important than being safe, and people who peer pressure us can make things sound more safe or less of a big deal than they really are.

Well done if your answers looked anything like this.

It is time to move on to our second learning cycle, How Can We Say No To Our Friends? It can be really hard to say no to our friends, especially for young people.

Holly says that, "When we're younger, we're still figuring out our boundaries and the kinds of people that we want to be friends with.

We can also be more conscious of what other people think about us.

This means that we're more aware of it, and this can make it harder to say no to our friends." David says that, "The people around us are figuring things out to.

We're all learning what we enjoy, what makes us feel comfortable, and what we don't like too and what makes us feel uncomfortable.

Learning what to say yes to and what to say no to is part of growing up, and we all make mistakes sometimes, even as adults.

Those mistakes are an important part of the learning process about who we are and what we like and don't like." If a friend suggests doing something that makes us feel uncomfortable, our body might give us signals.

We might experience our heart beating fast, or it might feel like our heart drops in our chest.

We might also feel that we have a funny tummy or that our stomach is tied and knots.

These are all signals that we're being asked to do something that makes us feel uncomfortable.

Let's do a check for understanding to see how you're doing with this learning cycle.

Which of these are signs that we might feel uncomfortable? Is it A, funny tummy, B, normal breathing, C, slow heartbeat, or D, fast heartbeat? What do you think? Pause the video, talk to the people around you or have a think to yourself.

Well done if you said that A and D are correct.

We can experience a funny tummy or a fast heartbeat as signs that we might feel uncomfortable, but remember that everyone's body is different and we might all experience slightly different things when we feel uncomfortable.

Well done if you got this right.

We can say no to our friends at any time, but we should especially say no if they suggest something that makes us feel uncomfortable or unsafe.

We can say no firmly and clearly.

For example, we can say, "No thank you.

I don't want to do that." "No, that's not safe." "No, I'm good, thanks," or, "No, let's do something else instead." These are all examples of way that we can say no firmly and clearly without being rude or unkind.

We can also walk away from the situation.

This can feel difficult, especially if the situation is with our friends, but it's especially important if we feel unsafe or like we're in a dangerous situation.

Holly says, "I've learned that by walking away from the situation, I can keep myself safe and I can get help if others aren't being safe too.

Often, I just need some time and space to feel comfortable again after experiencing peer pressure." There are lots of different ways that we can walk away from a situation, and some of them can actually be quite subtle.

This means that it's harder for others to notice.

David wants to share his story.

He says, "When I felt peer pressure before, I've made excuses, like I need to go to the bathroom or my dad is just called to say he needs to pick me up.

In situations where we feel uncomfortable or unsafe, it's okay to do what we need to do to stay safe and to be okay." Let's do another check for understanding.

This time, I'd like you to decide if this statement is true or false.

"It's always okay to walk away or say no to our friends if we feel unsafe or uncomfortable." Pause the video, tell the person next to you or have a think to yourself.

Well done if you said that this is true.

It's always okay to walk away or say no to our friends if we feel unsafe or uncomfortable.

Well done if you got this right.

Trusted adults can also help us with issues around peer pressure.

They can help us to say no if we need some support, and they can also explain to others why peer pressure is unacceptable if they are peer pressuring other people.

Holly says, "I've spoken to my teacher before about peer pressure and he was great.

He spoke to the whole year group about peer pressure and why it's not okay.

He also helped me to find ways in which I'm more comfortable saying no." It's always okay to ask for help from a trusted adult if we're struggling with peer pressure or if we are just not sure what to do.

Learning how to say no to others is a life skill, and trusted adults can help us to manage it ourselves if it's appropriate.

David says, "When I felt peer pressure to play certain games online, my dad helped me to learn how to say no, and he told me that saying no can be a brave thing to do.

It felt better just talking about it, and I soon began to feel confident enough to say no myself." Well done, David.

By talking about peer pressure with a trusted adult, your dad, you were able to solve the situation for yourself and practise saying no.

Good friends make us feel safe, comfortable, and respected.

Ms. Walsh reminds us that, "Everyone deserves to have friends that make them feel good.

It's important to remember that whilst it's good to care for other people and to do kind things for them, we need to look after our own needs and often get what we want too." If a friend does pressure us or puts us in an unsafe or uncomfortable situation, we may decide that the best choice is to end the friendship.

Ms. Walsh says that, "We can end friendships ourselves or we can ask a trusted adult for support.

Ending friendships can be really hard, so it's important to ask for help if you need it." Let's do another check for understanding.

This time, I'd like you to decide who is correct.

Izzy says, "We can get help from trusted adults if we're having issues with peer pressure.

We don't have to be friends with people who peer pressure us," but Laura says, "We have to deal with peer pressure on our own.

We have to continue friendships with people who peer pressure us because otherwise, it'll make them upset." Who do you think is correct, Izzy or Laura? Pause the video, talk to the people around you or have a think to yourself.

Well done if you said that Izzy is correct.

We can always get help from a trusted adult if we're experiencing peer pressure or are worried about something in particular, and we don't have to be friends with people who peer pressure us.

If we experience peer pressure from a friend, we can choose to end the friendship.

Well done if you got this right.

It is time to move on to our final practise task, and well done for your hard work so far.

For this task, I'd like you to draw and label three pictures that show the different ways that we can say no to what our friends.

Pause the video, and we'll go through what you might have said in a few minutes.

Let's see what you might have drawn.

You might have drawn something like a stop sign for saying no firmly and clearly.

You might have drawn a person walking away from the situation.

And you might have drawn a trusted adult for talking to a trusted adult.

Well done if your pictures look anything like this.

We're now going to summarise the key learning from today's lesson.

In today's lesson, we've learned that everyone has different motivations, for example, money, power, and being popular.

Often, we can want to be popular among our friends and this means that we can want to be liked and thought of highly.

We can sometimes want to please our friends and remain popular, even if this makes us feel uncomfortable or unsafe.

Saying no to friends can be hard, especially for young people.

It's important to know how to say no to our friends.

If we experience peer pressure, we can say no firmly and clearly, walk away, or talk to a trusted adult, like a parent, carer, or a teacher at school.

During this lesson, you might have found that you've got some worries or questions, and if you do, it's really important that you share these with a trusted adult.

There's also some resources on the screen that are there to help you too.

Well done for your hard work in today's lesson.

I've really enjoyed teaching you, and I hope to see you in another lesson soon.