Lesson video

Hi, I'm Ms. Lowe, and I'm the RSHE teacher for today.

Thank you so much for choosing to complete your learning with me.

Today's lesson is all about bullying, and because of the content that we're gonna cover today, it's important that you complete your learning with the company of an adult.

So here's our outcome for today's lesson.

By the end, you'll be able to explain what the difference between bullying and banter is and where bullying can happen.

Every RSHE lesson should begin with a set of ground rules.

This ensures that every conversation had in RSHE is respectful and we're all able to learn effectively.

So Laura is reminding us that in RSHE, we should listen to others.

It's okay to disagree with each other, but we should listen properly before making assumptions or deciding how to respond.

And when disagreeing, we challenge the statement and not the person.

Andeep is reminding us to respect privacy.

We can discuss examples, but we don't use names or descriptions that can identify anyone including ourselves.

Izzy is reminding us to choose a level of participation that suits us.

Everyone has the right to choose not to answer a question or to join in a discussion, but we never put anyone on the spot.

And finally, Jacob is reminding us that in RSHE, there is no judgement.

We can explore beliefs and misunderstandings about a topic without the fear of being judged.

Here are our key words for today's lesson.

Let's go through those definitions together.

Bullying, this is behaviour which is intended to hurt someone emotionally or physically.

Banter: This is friendly joking and teasing between people.

It's meant to be fun, not mean or hurtful.

Compassion, feeling care for others when they're hurting and wanting to make them feel better.

Now today's lesson, we're gonna be answering two questions, and we're beginning by asking the question, what's the difference between bullying and banter? There are two key features of bullying.

The first one is that it is intentional, and this means that it's done purposefully to cause somebody harm or upset.

The second key feature is that it is repeated, meaning that it happens more than once.

Lucas here is telling us that there are four different types of bullying that someone could experience, and these are emotional, physical, cyber, and social.

Now let's pause here and let's check our understanding.

Bullying is, there are four options on the screen.

I want you to read through all of them and then tell me which two are the correct answers, and we'll go through it together.

Well done if you said B, it is repeated, so it happens more than once.

And D, it is intentional, which means that somebody has done it purposefully to hurt, cause harm or upset someone.

Now, emotional bullying is when someone behaves in a way that impacts a victim's self-esteem or sense of safety.

Emotional bullying may involve purposely leaving someone out, giving them the silent treatment, so refusing to talk to them or even acknowledge that they're there, making fun of them in front of others or trying to make them feel guilty or ashamed.

Sofia here is telling us that emotional bullying might also involve something called gaslighting, which is where someone makes another person doubt their own feelings and experiences.

So let's have a look at this idea of gaslighting in more detail.

So gaslighting can look like comments like this, "You're really overreacting.

It's not a big deal." "It wasn't like that.

You've not remembered that right," or "You're too sensitive.

It was just a joke." So as you can see from these comments here, what they're doing is they're making the person that they're aimed at question their own experiences and their own emotions, making them question themselves.

And this is a form of emotional bullying.

Next we have physical bullying.

So this is when someone uses physical acts in order to harm someone that may involve actions like hitting, kicking, pushing, or any other form of physical violence.

Andeep is telling us that physical bullying also may include damage to a person's property, so things that that person owns.

Next we have cyber bullying.

So cyber bullying is bullying that occurs in online spaces.

It can involve different things.

It can involve someone harassing another person online.

It could involve someone making hurtful comments on people's posts, spreading rumours or sending them upsetting content.

Sam is telling us here that cyber bullying could also involve impersonating the victim or other people in order to humiliate them.

Next we have social bullying.

So this is a way of trying to damage another person's reputation or relationships.

This happens through things like exclusion, excluding people from a group.

It may also involve encouraging others to reject them, using peer pressure to isolate them or embarrassing them in person or online.

Aisha says that social bullying might also involve things like mocking someone's background, their hobbies, or their interests.

Now let's pause here and let's check our understanding.

Which form of bullying is being described in this scenario? I'm gonna read the scenario to you and then you are gonna pause the video straight after and have a think about which form of bullying is being described.

Someone at school is being continuously mean to me in the corridors to and from lessons.

They push me when I'm walking to class.

And the other day they pulled my bag off my back and it ripped.

It ruined my school bag and it made me feel really upset and I was worried to tell My mum what happened.

So you should have said that this is an example of physical bullying.

And this is because the person responsible is using physical acts to bully the person they are pushing them.

When they pulled their bag and they ripped it, that is another form of physical bullying because that has caused damage to this person's property.

So well done if you said physical bullying.

Sometimes we can playfully tease our friends or those who are close to us, and this is known as banter.

However, banter can cross the line and become bullying if we don't listen to the feelings and the needs of the person who's being teased.

Laura is giving us some great information here, and she's telling us that the difference between banter and bullying is the intent, the impact, and whether or not it is mutual.

So banter is usually done without the intention to hurt another person.

It's usually lighthearted, and the person will usually not be upset about what has been said.

Ms. Walsh here says that we should listen to our friends.

If they say that the banter is starting to hurt their feelings, then continuing to do it would become bullying.

And that is because then the intention has changed.

If someone has told you that the things that you are saying is upsetting them, even if you meant it as a joke, if you continue to do that, that crosses the line into bullying.

This is because despite knowing it upsets them or intentionally hurting their feelings.

So let's pause the video here and let's check our understanding.

So which of these four words on the screen best describe banter? So pause the video and have a think.

So you should have Said A and C.

It is mutual.

So both people are in on the joke and it's something that is shared between friends or people who are close to each other.

And C, it is lighthearted.

It's not intended to hurt someone's feelings.

Any banter should be respectful and we shouldn't ignore our friends' boundaries.

If they say they don't like it anymore, all we should do is stop immediately.

Ms. Walsh says here that the impact of banter should be bullying.

Lighthearted teasing can be a completely normal part of a healthy friendship or relationship.

However, if the impact is no longer positive and it doesn't feel lighthearted, then it has become bullying and it should stop.

So as we mentioned before, banter should also be mutual.

This means that everybody involved is in on the joke and they all find it lighthearted and amusing.

Sofia says here that if only one person is involved in teasing another and it's the other person who doesn't join in, or if they don't find it funny, it then becomes bullying if it continues.

Now, we should always treat our friends with compassion and respect.

This means that we listen to their thoughts, their feelings, and their boundaries.

I want to say again that there is nothing wrong with engaging in mutual banter, but if we don't treat our friends compassionately, we can risk crossing that line into bullying and really hurting our friends' feelings.

Now let's pause the video here again and let's check our understanding.

When does banter become bullying? There are three options on the screen there.

I want you to read through each one of them and then tell me the correct answer and we'll go through it together in a moment.

Well done if you said B.

So banter becomes bullying when our friend tells us it hurts their feelings, but we continue anyway, and we've said that that is because the intention has changed.

You are now doing that knowing that that's hurting someone's feeling.

It's no longer mutual and it's no longer lighthearted.

Now we're gonna put our learning into practise.

So what I would like for you to do is explain to this person why what they've said to their friend has crossed the line from banter to bullying.

I'm gonna read it to you.

You are gonna then pause the video and write down your explanation.

"My friend and I always tease each other.

One day I made a joke about the shoes he was wearing saying it looked like he needed new ones.

Everyone found it funny but him.

He told me his parents couldn't afford to get him new ones and asked me not to say it again.

The next time I saw him, I did mention it again and everyone but him laughed.

I don't see the problem.

It's only banter." So you had a statement from someone before and you were asked to explain to them why what they've said to their friend has crossed that line from banter into bullying.

And you might have said this, banter is mutual and lighthearted, meaning both people are in on the joke and it doesn't ignore any boundaries.

Once your friend told you that what you said hurt their feelings, your banter crossed the line into bullying.

When you chose to continue.

By continuing to make fun of him for something that upset him, your intention has changed as you're saying something purposefully hurtful, and this is bullying.

Now I would like for you to advise this person on what they should have done to avoid their banter becoming bullying.

So I'd like you to write a paragraph advising this person what they could have done to avoid their banter becoming bullying.

So you were asked to give advice to this person, and you might have said, "We should treat our friends with compassion and respect.

Occasional teasing and banter are okay in a healthy friendship, but we shouldn't do things that we know hurt a friend's feelings.

We should listen to them when they express their boundaries and avoid doing things that we know upsets them.

Once your friend told you their feelings were hurt, you should have apologised and not said it again." Moving on now to the second part of our lesson where we're asking the question, where can bullying happen? Now, bullying is not something that is limited to a physical location.

Harmful behaviour can occur anywhere that people gather together or are in communication with each other.

Bullying is about the intention, the impact, and the repetition of the behaviour rather than the place that it happens.

So bullying can happen anywhere, unfortunately.

It could happen in school, at work, online, at home, or in clubs and community spaces.

Now let's pause our lesson here and let's check our understanding.

So true or false, it is only considered bullying when you're at school.

When you get older, bullying doesn't happen.

Pause the video here and tell me, is that true or false? Well done if you said false.

Now this is false because bullying is linked to behaviour rather than a physical place.

It can occur anywhere that people gather or in communication with each other.

So it can happen in person and online.

So bullying can happen at school, it can happen within different spaces in a school, such as the playground, the corridors, cafeterias, or even on school transport.

Ms. Walsh here says it can happen between strangers or it can happen between friends.

Either way, it can make the victims feel unsafe in school.

Victims may even avoid the spaces that bullying occurs in, which might mean avoiding attending school altogether.

Next, we have work.

So bullying can happen in all types of work environments.

It can take place in an office or on site.

It could happen in meetings, on work trips, and it can even happen in person or over email and group chats.

Jacob's telling us here that bullying might occur at work between someone of a more senior position and a lower level employee, or even between peers.

So people on the same level within work.

And just like bullying that happens at school, it can make the victim feel unwelcome or unsafe, and it can even make them avoid work all together.

Next we have online.

So cyber bullying can happen in any online spaces such as social media platforms, discussion forums, or in private messages, texts or group chats.

As we saw before, bullying can even happen over email.

Alex is telling us here that cyber bullying is just as harmful as in-person bullying 'cause it can make victims feel equally unsafe or upset.

It may make the victims avoid using certain online spaces or can make them less trustworthy of others offline.

So cyber bullying isn't something that is restricted to an experience that people have in online spaces.

It can affect them in real life as well, and it is just as harmful as in-person bullying.

Now let's pause here and let's check our understanding.

True or false, bullying that takes place online can be just as harmful as in-person bullying.

Well done if you said true.

So bullying can also take place within home environments and be carried out by family members or carers.

Jun is telling us here that this form of bullying may be particularly harmful because a person's home is where they should feel the most safe.

Victims of bullying at home may feel unsafe, unhappy, or worried about being at home, and it can lead them to feeling isolated and alone.

Bullying can also happen at clubs and community spaces.

Bullying can take place at clubs or in external activity centres like football grounds or youth groups.

It can be between peers or it could be between a leader and someone within the club itself.

Sofia tells us that if this happens, victims may no longer wish to attend and then miss out on the opportunities that they deserve.

It can make victims feel anxious to attend other extracurricular spaces for fear that it might happen to them again.

Ms. Walsh here is saying that bullying is never acceptable and we should treat everyone that we meet with compassion and respect because no matter where bullying happens, it can still have a serious negative impact on the victim.

So if you ever experience or witness bullying, no matter where you are, you should speak to a trusted adult.

If it happens in school, you can report it to a teacher or a DSL, which is a designated safeguarding lead.

You can also report any type of bullying to a trusted adult at home.

If the bullying happens online, you should block and report the account responsible and tell a trusted adult as soon as possible.

Now, let's pause here and let's check our understanding.

Where can bullying happen? I want you to read through those three options and then we'll go through the correct answer together.

Well done if you said anywhere.

Remember, bullying is linked to a particular behaviour rather than a particular place.

And now we're gonna put our learning into practise one last time.

So I would like for you to discuss with your partner where bullying can happen and what we should do if we experience or witness bullying.

I'm gonna pause the video here, have those discussions, and then we'll have a look at what you might have said in a moment.

So you were asked with your partner to discuss where bullying can happen and what we should do if we experience or witness it.

So your discussions might have included bullying can happen anywhere.

It isn't specific to a particular time or place 'cause it can even happen online.

It could happen to a child in and around school or an adult at work, either in the office over emails or in meetings.

It could also happen at home or at clubs and other community spaces.

If you experience or witness bullying anywhere, you should report it to a trusted adult either at home or at school.

If it occurs online, you could also block and report the account.

Now let's have a look at a summary of what we've learned together today.

So bullying is intentional, repetitive behaviour, which is intended to hurt someone emotionally or physically.

Bullying can be physical, emotional, social, or cyber, and can have serious impacts on the victim.

Banter should be lighthearted and mutual.

Banter can cross the line into bullying if we know that what we're saying or doing is upsetting someone, but we continue to do it anyway.

Bullying is not specific to a time or place and can happen anywhere.

We should treat everyone with compassion and respect and bullying is never okay.

If we witness it, we should report it to a trusted adult.

Now, if any of the things that we've talked about in today's lesson concern you in any way, here are some places that you can go to to get support.

First, we have Childline, a website and phone line, which is able to offer confidential advice and support.

And finally, CEOP, which helps protect children from online abuse and exploitation.

And I would like to end today's lesson by saying a big well done for all your fantastic work.

It's been wonderful to teach you, and I look forward to seeing you in another RSHE lesson soon.